Category: Love and relationships

“Have a beautiful day”

by The Whimsey Angel, posted in Life Journey, Love and relationships, Reflection, self discovery, Spiritual, Uncategorized

“Have a beautiful day” a phrase I, and others use often.

But what does that mean ~ exactly?

I believe it means this

Whatever beauty is to you, BE that.

If beauty is kindness ~ be kind.

If you see beauty in a smile ~ give yours (smile) away.

If you find beauty in artistic talent ~ express yourself artistically.

If you find beauty in intimate moments ~ create some.

If you find beauty in culinary expression ~ go wild over the grill.

If you find beauty in nature ~ be in nature and be grateful for all that surrounds you.

If you appreciate the dance of beautiful words stung together to create inspirational poetry or a heart warming novel ~ get lost in a good book.

If beauty is your family, friends or pets ~ spend time with them.

Or, you might find beauty in fashion and makeup ~ so get gussied up and go out.

Beauty is the things that tickle our hearts and bring us to life. Beauty truly does live in the eye and the heart of the beholder. When we become the things we find beautiful, our inner beauty shines outward and that makes the world a “beautiful” place to be.

Be Beautiful 😊

Sometimes, wisdom just shows up.

by The Whimsey Angel, posted in grief, healing, life challenges, Life Journey, Love and relationships, Reflection, self discovery, Spiritual

Sometimes, wisdom just shows up.

I don’t know how.

I don’t know why.

But I “know” that it’s arrived and it’s meant just for me.

It shows up for all of us.

You feel it in your gut, you hear it on the wind, and in rain drops as they tap against the window of your soul trying to get your attention.

It whispers to you in your dreams, appears in clouds as you gaze across the sky.

Sometimes this knowing arrives in the eyes of a complete stranger. It can feel as if this wisdom rode in on a lighten bolt to land at your front door. When actually, this deep sense of knowing surfaced from deep inside of you.

It often shows up during our greatest life storms or, when we’re completely still.

It’s an understanding, a deep sense of truth, an ah-ha moment when you just “know”.

This knowing is the sound of some”thing” calling you.

Listen to it.

Its a Soul thing.

Toni O’K ~🌹❤️

Stop feeding a beast that doesn’t exist.

by The Whimsey Angel, posted in healing, life challenges, Life Journey, Love and relationships, Reflection, self discovery, Spiritual

Once upon-a-time there was a girl.

She believed in herself.

She believed in everyone around her.

She believed in kindness, compassion, gratitude, magic and love.

She went into the world and came upon an angry, soulless beast.

He looked at her and ripped her beliefs from her soul.

He handed her a sack filled with FEAR;

~ Fear of judgment

~ Fear of punishment

~ Fear of alienation and rejection

~ Fear of pain

~ Fear of heartache

~ Fear of her own creativity

and demanded that she never put it down.

She saw others carrying similar sacks so she complied, she thought it was what she was supposed to do.

So she carried that sack for years. It was heavy and weighed her down.

Deep inside she ached for who she knew she was supposed to be. The memories of who she authentically was kept her soul always hopeful. But, too afraid to BE herself, she continued to carry the sack.

Years went by and she met the beast again. He was weak and haggard and she asked him, “Why did you ask me to carry these things?”

“Because,” he said, “I was afraid of what your beautiful soul might accomplish, I was jealous of the light that radiated from you. I wanted your light for myself. I wanted to shine and wanted you to always be heavy with fear. I wanted to control your light.”

“But you’re not shining, you are not radiating my light?” she replied.

“Yes I know,” said the beast. “You’re light belongs to you, it will only shine for you.”

“Who are you?” she boldly asked?”

“I am no thing. I am no person. I am no place.

I am the manifestation of collective human fear, greed, anger, jealousy and hatred.”

In that moment she realized he had no power over her. It was she that had given her power away to him.

She dropped the sack.

She stared into his eyes and without breaking his gaze, reached into his cold, dark heart and tore out what was hers and put it back where it belonged.

And she felt whole again.

She was not angry, she was not spiteful, she was grateful that she had taken back her power and her light.

She did not slay the beast, she didn’t have to, she kissed him on the forehead, stroked his cheek and left him there to die.

And she lived happily ever after.😊

Don’t give your power over to fear.

Stop feeding a beast that doesn’t exist.

Toni O’K~🌹❤️

BE with Love

by The Whimsey Angel, posted in Life Journey, Love and relationships, Reflection, self discovery

BE with Love❤️

Can we all stop fighting for love and just BE with Love? Even the term “Fight For Love” is hostile and a bit of an oxymoron.

Back in the days of our Neanderthal ancestors there was some fighting, hair pulling and a bit of clubbing (different than the type of clubbing that goes on these days to find a mate), but people, we have evolved, or have we?

Divorce rates for first time marriages in North America hover around 40% and second time marriage divorce rates are at 60%. I believe this is related to the false and unsustainable fronts some people create until that little gold (or I guess these days platinum) band is wrapped around their finger.

When we allow ourselves to BE with love, it means we are BEING our authentic self. We are BEING real about who we are, what our flaws and phobias are and BEING who we are meant to be. It means both partners are BEING clear about what they want their lives to look like, so they’re not trying to change each other after they’re well into a relationship.

When we approach love this way the right people will be drawn to us. If someone wants to be in your life based on who you really are, they will show up for you. If they are not interested, they are not meant for you. It should be simple; be honest about who you are and let people fall in love with the real you, not a manufacturer version of you.

If you have to fight, stalk, manipulate, or tolerate unhealthy behaviours, that’s not love.

So can we please stop encouraging people (especially young people) to fight for love, or to conspire to find love. We might be telling them to chase or fight for things and people not meant for them.

Encourage them to BE with love, to be patient with love, to be themselves, and if they need to work on themselves first encourage them to do that before they partner up.

My god the entire world seems to be fighting for something; for peace, for power, for human dignity, for control, the last thing we need to fight for is love.

Sending you warm wishes for a beautiful day, May you BE with Love with the one you Love💕

Toni O’K~🌹❤️

Love with no expectation

by The Whimsey Angel, posted in Life Journey, Love and relationships, self discovery

Despite my dating and relationship mis-adventures, I remain a hopeful and optimistic romantic. What have my own relationship follies taught me? this~ We Must Love With No Expectations.

When we surrender to loving authentically, with no expectation, we release ourselves and our partners from the burden of jealousy, anger and the fears that often creep into our romantic relationships.

When we impose expectations, behaviours or issue ultimatums, we’re almost always disappointed. However, when both partners give affection freely and feel supported, understood and appreciated for “exactly who they are” both partners flourish and grow.

We can’t control another persons behaviour nor can we force anyone to love us, to change for us or to make us happy. My happiness is my job. Your happiness is your job.

One does not ask a rose to bloom before its time, nor do we ask it to grow into a daisy or a tulip. So we can’t expect our partners to grow into something they’re not, or expect them to bloom before it’s their time.

If our romantic relationships are going to be successful, we must enter these relationships with our eyes, hearts and minds wide open. This means we enter our relationship knowing exactly who our partner is, and accept them “as is” without the expectation that we can “fix” them or that they even want to be fixed.

It’s not your job to fix or heal your partner. However, when we love authentically with no expectations our partners may be motivated to heal or fix themselves or, to ask for help if they need it.

We don’t choose who we fall in love with, but we do choose how we behave and what we tolerate in our relationships.

Love should NOT leave us feeling anxious, stressed, frustrated, manipulated, fearful or hopeless. Love should leave us feeling respected, happy, excited, grateful and hopeful. If it doesn’t, the question is NOT “How do I fix this person or make them change” the question should be, “Is my life better because of this relationship?” If the answer is no, then you, not your partner, has a decision to make. You are not responsible for their behaviour. You’re only responsible for yours.

Love is meant to lift us up not tear us down. Love should be an amazing adventure of trust and discovery where both partners cheer each other on as they grow into the best versions of themselves.

This short piece I wrote awhile ago sums it up;

“Accept me as I am,

Trusting that together we’ll both grow into the best versions of ourselves.

My flaws, my imperfections are a part of me and my journey to discover who I am.

If we walk side-by-side, carrying all that we are, our loads will get lighter as we learn and grow together.

We will abandon behaviours and unpack the things we’ve dragged through life not because we’ve asked each other too let go, but because we’ve learnt that these things no longer serve us.

I will not bloom before my time nor will I ask you to grow into anything but who you are meant to be.

So take this journey with me, love me as I am, I will love you the same way, as you are, because I know with you, I’ll come to understand the beautiful mess I’ve been, and the beautiful miracles we’re both growing into.”

Toni O’Keeffe~🌹❤️

We are the poetry

by The Whimsey Angel, posted in grief, Life Journey, Love and relationships, Spiritual

By Toni O’Keeffe

We need not look beyond our own lives, our own hearts, our own curious souls to find the answers.

We are the echos of wisdom left behind by all those that came before us.

We are the foot prints leading towards greater understand of all that is.

We are the songs that ignite passion, tears and dance.

We are the deep whispers that exhale in the night guiding each other home.

We are the chapters and

the puzzle pieces in each others lives.

We are raindrops, heartache and the cover that shelters one another from life’s storms.

We are mountains, forests, oceans, and the wide open spaces that call us to explore.

We are fear, joy, unsettled thoughts and lies. We are the peace, the war and injustice that surrounds us.

We are the colours of our own lives, the magic, the madness and the miracles. We are all the things we seek.

And,

We are the masterpiece we crave to create.

Look inwards my dear ones, that is where you will find the answers to all questions, all pain, all life.

I am the rhythm and the words that will set you and I free.

Together;

We are the poetry

TO’K~ 🌹❤️

Thank you for not loving me

by The Whimsey Angel, posted in Life Journey, Love and relationships

Thank you for not loving me.

Thank you for keeping me waiting in the background of your life just in case.

Thank you for making me feel less worthy than others and making me think nobody else could possibly love me.

Thank you for sleepless nights and dreams that never came true.

Thank you for the constant ache as I hoped.

Thank you for another layer of heartache and grief to lay over the ones already there piercing my mind, body and spirit.

I’m grateful that you played with my heart and lied to my soul.

Because of you, I fell.

I fell to a place full of feelings and words and understanding.

I fell into a place where the only choice was to crawl upwards.

I know now that none of it had anything to do with me.

I am bold and beautiful and passionate and deep and wise, and kind and loving and funny and sometimes, some people just don’t know what to do with all of that.

But someday, somebody will.

If you had loved me I might have been tempted to hide all that I am to allow you to feel better about all that you are not.

I love you and I’m grateful that you entered my life, you have given me the opportunity to look inward and finally see all the beautiful music and magic that I am.

So, thank you for not loving me.