A positive life will never be built using a negative mind❤️
Category: happiness
~ Focus happiness, not perfection,
Perfection, if it exists at all, implies flawlessness, while happiness is a state of emotional wellbeing.
Happiness exists when we appreciate what we have and find joy in our everyday lives and relationships. The pursuit of perfection however, can be stressful, costly and erode the joy we have in our lives and negatively impact our self worth and emotional wellbeing.
Whether it’s the pursuit of a perfect face, a perfect body, the perfect outfit, perfect partner, perfect decor, perfect home, perfect job, or some other perfect “thing”, it’s exhausting.
If we’re always distracted seeking perfection, we will never be happy being who we are, with what we already have?
As children most of us were happy messy little characters, playing with sticks in the creek, wearing shirts with missing buttons and mismatched socks. Life was simple. Then, at some point, the world told us we weren’t good enough.
Seeking to improve oneself is different than seeking perfection. Improving oneself is about doing your best and being happy with what you’ve accomplished and happy with who you are, without comparing yourself to others.
Perfection is a constant competition to keep up with social standards that are completely subjective.
Striving for perfection holds us back from seeing and appreciating all the beautiful, simple things about ourselves that make each of us unique, and appreciating all the little miracles we bump into every day.
So be gentle with yourself. Stop seeking perfection in our imperfect world. Let’s teach our children to focus on gratitude, mindfulness, kindness and self love and, happiness will follow.
You don’t need to seek perfection, you’re already perfect, being you, and thats the only thing any of us can be perfectly, perfect at.
Toni O’Keeffe🔆
Let’s create more happy moments for each other~
Let’s create more happy, authentic and magical moments for each other. Moments staring into the sky marvelling at the vastness before us and believing anything is possible.
Moments making art, making music, making friends, laughing, running through sprinklers and riding on handle bars.
More moments dipping our toes in the sand, playing in the waves, gazing at rainbows, taking in the sunrise and sunset, sitting around campfires, under starry nights or stormy skies with the ones we love.
More moments tickling our senses, feeling grateful and allowing ourselves to be fully alive as we inhale the sights, the sounds and the lushness of the natural world, aka the real world, and exhale the noise, the clutter, the busyness, the demands of our messy (kinda’ weird) modern society.
Toni O’KEEFFE 🌹❤️
Happy looks good on you😃
Happy looks good on you, you should wear that more often! 😃
The science on “happiness” has shown that being happy is good for your physical health, mental well-being, spiritual wellness, your relationships and social connections.
If you want to get more of your “happy on,” engage in daily physical activity(even a little goes along way), make healthier dietary choices, cultivate a positive attitude towards life (see the glass as 1/2 full, not half empty), foster connections and networks of support with like-minded people, practice gratitude and engage in creative hobbies or passions.
If you want to go the extra happiness mile, stop being so judgmental, stop messing in other people’s business and lives. Stop worrying and overthinking so much. Let go of grudges and anything that keeps you stuck in the past. And, stop being so offended by things that have nothing to do with you (like the colour of your neighbours skin, sexual orientation or belief system.)
We all go through stuff, sometimes really horrible stuff, that kicks the happy right out of us and brings us down. Cultivating a positive and happy attitude and approach towards life will make it easier if and when you do have to deal with the tough stuff.
Oh and FYI, multiple surveys have shown happy people are generally deemed to be more attractive than those with pessimistic/negative attitudes, just sayen’.
So let’s all get happy!!!
Love Toni 🤗❤️
The secret to happiness
The secret to happiness is to;
“Stop looking for the secret to happiness.”
You know what makes you happy. Do that.
Do things and be with the people who bring you to life, lift you up, make you feel “happy”, make you laugh, make your heart dance, your soul sing and make you a better, more grateful, human being. Or, if you enjoy and are happy, doing things alone, do more of that.
Stay away from things and people who bring you down, make your heart ache, your soul heavy, your mind crazy and your body unwell.
If nurturing a positive attitude serves you better than harbouring a negative attitude, then stay positive and, stay away from those who are toxic and have a negative perspective on life.
Even if you’re in a situation, such as an unhappy relationship or an unhappy work environment, you still have options, one being, you can make plans to move on.
Happiness isn’t something we look for.
“Happy,” is something we choose to become. It’s an attitude about ourselves and life, which will look different for each of us.
Beautiful soul, go get your happy on, because you my dear, deserve to be oh-so-beautifully-happy.
Toni O’KEEFFE 🌹❤️
Everything you need❤️
Everything you need;
to live your best life,
is in here ❤️
not out there…🌍
Your heart
and soul,
they know
the way,
they have
the answers,
they carry
your truth,
Slow down.
Breathe.
Listen.
Toni O’KEEFFE ~🌹❤️
You can get unstuck~
The day may come when the people, things and habits you’re used to, no longer fit or feel like you. Embrace the calling to let these things go and move on.
We’re not meant to stay stuck in the same place or the same mindset.
When water stops flowing it can become stagnate, foul, murky and toxic. If we stay stuck in the same place or mind set for too long, we can also become stagnant, foul, murky and toxic.
Our minds are meant to be exercised and fed. When we’re not grazing on new knowledge, new vistas, new opportunities or new adventures, we can get stuck.
We’re meant to flow, to move forward, to have new experiences, learn new things, challenge our own thinking, and grow.
Change can feel overwhelming and it might feel easier to stay in the box we know. Human beings do this all the time. We stay in uncomfortable relationships, uncomfortable situations, uncomfortable jobs, uncomfortable communities, uncomfortable shoes and uncomfortable behaviours and habits that add little joy to ours lives, because it’s familiar, it’s what, or sometimes “ALL”, we know.
But, once you rise, step out of your comfort zone, stretch your enthusiasm, move beyond your fear and shake off the old, you’re ready to take on the new.
Don’t waste your one beautiful life and your curious and hungry mind, remaining stuck in one place. The place that feels familiar may not be the place you belong.
Toni O’KEEFFE ~🌹❤️
***If you need help getting unstuck, reach out for support🙏🤗
Not all empty spaces need to be filled~
From time-to-time many of us feel an emptiness, a lacking or void we think we need to fill in order to be happy.
We exhaust ourselves chasing happiness, chasing love, searching for meaning, chasing more of this or more of that, buying stuff to try and fill the emptiness or the sense of “lacking” in our lives.
Trying to fill this emptiness with material possessions, temporary companionship, drugs, alcohol, and busyness, almost never works. These things might mask what’s going on beneath the surface for a short period of time, but, they rarely lead to sustained fulfillment.
Perhaps this sense of emptiness is not something that needs to be filled, but something that needs to be FELT.
Perhaps this space within the ether of our chaotic human mind, is actually a waiting room that’s meant to be left wide-open, allowing old feelings, attitudes and pain to leave, and new feelings, thoughts and peace to arrive. A space we visit to lance our wounds, release our tears and the stifled ache of pent-up grief, pain, loneliness, remorse or sadness until we understand “it” and find the lesson in “it”. A space to purge the ugliness of what’s hurt us in the past and let “it” go – creating space for new things, new purpose, new meaning, to arrive. A space where we push the darkness out, and let the light in.
When the ache of emptiness or lacking creeps in, rather than trying to fill it, try to feel it. Take a walk, exercise, journal, open up and start talking to someone, go into nature, sit quietly and meditate. It doesn’t matter which path you take to get to this space, what matters is that you arrive, and when you do, you ask your pain what it’s trying to teach you. Then listen, feel, and release the things that no longer serve you or bring you peace. The answer(s) may not come right away. You may need to visit this space several times. When the answers begin to arrive, thank your pain for the lessons, then let it go. As it leaves, visualize new energy, new purpose, new feelings of wellness and hopefulness arrive. Then go out and live this one beautiful life you’ve been given.
This concept may sound abstract, however, if you’ve been feeling the ache of emptiness within, and what you’ve been doing to fill the void has not been working, what have you got to lose? other than the ache of the emptiness that haunts you.
Perhaps not all empty spaces are meant to be filled, perhaps they’re meant to be felt.
Toni O’KEEFFE~🌹❤️
The perfect partner does not exist, they become ~
Millions of single people (and people in unhappy relationships) are consumed with finding the perfect partner.
They scour dating sites and social media profiles, look across crowded rooms, join singles clubs or go to bars looking for “the one”.
In reality, I don’t believe this perfect partner exists. They “become”.
When two perfectly flawed, quirky people come together, they can BECOME perfect for each other if they accept each other as they are, trusting that together they can grow into better versions of themselves.
Human beings have a tendency to be judgmental and look at the messy flaws in each other before we look at the endearing and beautiful qualities we all possess. If you do this (assess the flaws) you’ll never find “the one” because we’re all messy little humans filled with flaws and cracks.
When we plant a seed or a bulb in the ground, it’s messy, it doesn’t grow over night. When planted in the right conditions and when it’s taken care of, the seed grows into exactly what it’s supposed to be. Relationships are the same, they don’t just happen. When planted in the right conditions and with the right care, they can flourish and grow.
*The right conditions implies there are no abuse, infidelity, addiction, moral differences or other serious issues that have to be addressed.
Everything ever created (even YOU) was messy in the beginning. An oak tree, a symphony, a work-of-art, a relationship, all require time to germinate and grow before they BECOME the masterpiece they’re destined to be.
So try looking for the one who is not perfect, but is authentic and possesses qualities such as kindness, respect, a sense of humour, someone who’s supportive, caring, playful and shares similar values.
Then cheer each other on, comfort each other when things don’t go according to plan. When you disagree don’t argue, communicate.
There is some irony in me writing this piece, as I’ve had, hmm a few relationships. They all provided me with insights about myself and human relationships. In particular;
- When was kind, loving, supportive and understanding with my partners, we both grew into better versions of ourselves.
- When I expected a partner to change a behaviour or change things about themselves (or they had these expectations of me) the relationship went sideways quickly.
- When one partner tries to stop the other from growing, the relationship also sours quickly.
- Relationships work when both partners commit to growing together and, support one another in growing as individuals.
She may not have the perfect body, he may not be perfectly groomed, you may not see eye-to-eye on a-lot of things and, you probably both have flaws, annoying little habits and imperfections. Don’t let that stop you. If the core building blocks of kindness, respect, honesty and trust are there, and you’re both committed to becoming better versions of yourself, together you can BECOME a masterpiece.
Treat your partner like the partner of your dreams, and, they just might BECOME exactly that.
Toni O’Keeffe~🌹❤️
Hey you
Cut this out and put it on your fridge, bathroom mirror, headboard…wherever.❤️
Toni O’KEEFFE ~🌹❤️
The Whimsey Angel 